Gone Fishing

Why Fishing is Better than Sex

· You don't have to hide your Fishing magazines.
· It is perfectly acceptable to pay a professional to Fish with you once in a while.
· The Ten Commandments don't say anything about Fishing.
· If your partner takes pictures or videotapes of you Fishing, you don't have to worry about them showing up on the Internet if you become famous.
· Your Fishing partner doesn't get upset about people you fished with long ago
· It's perfectly respectable to Fish with a total stranger.
· When you see a really good Fisherperson, you don't have feel guilty about imagining the two of you Fishing together.
· If your regular Fishing partner isn't available, he/she won't object if you Fish with someone else.
· Nobody will ever tell you that you will go blind if you Fish by yourself.
· When dealing with Fishing pro, you never have to wonder if they are really an undercover cop.
· You don't have to go to a sleazy shop in a seedy neighbourhood to buy Fishing stuff.
· You can have a Fishing calendar on your wall at the office, tell Fishing jokes, and invite coworkers to Fish with you without getting sued for harassment.
· There are no Fishing-transmitted diseases.
· If you want to watch Fishing on television, you don't have to subscribe to the Playboy channel.
· Nobody expects you to Fish with the same partner for the rest of your life.
· Nobody expects you to give up Fishing if your partner loses interest in it.
· You don't have to be a newlywed to plan a vacation primarily to enjoy your favourite activity.
· Your Fishing partner will never say, "Not again? We just fished last week! Is fishing all you ever think about?"
If you go fishing and catch something, that's good; if you make love and catch something, that's bad.
Fish don't compare you to other fishermen.
Fish don't want to know how many fish you've caught in the past.
Fishermen lie about the one that got away; lovers lie about the one they caught.
If you catch and release a fish, you don't have to promise to remain friends afterwards.
You don't have to change your line to keep catching fish.
You can catch a fish on a 20¢ worm; to catch a woman, it takes at least dinner and a show.
Fish don't mind if you fall asleep while fishing.
· You wear rubbers on your feet, not on your Willy.
· If you want a bigger pole, you can have a bigger pole.
· Fish bite for a guy of 60, same as they do for a guy of 20.
· You're never called a jerk when you throw back an ugly fish.
· Fish are real happy when you pick up your gear and go home.